There are some cases I shy away from, it is not a hard fast rule, more like a guideline, something that makes me pause before I say yes to a case. One of those is bodyguarding, while bodyguard jobs pays well it is for the most part unrealistic for a guy like me.
I do not carry a gun, and I have not intention of ever doing so. If the threat to the principal is real, I do not want to be between them and a bullet. My mother taught me to avoid bullet wounds whenever possible.
The other reason people want a bodyguard it is as status symbol, and I do not want to be around those types of people.
But one time a couple of years ago when the money was right and certain other conditions were in alignment, mostly my wallet was empty, I did take a bodyguarding job.
That is how one Monday morning I was looking for Site 505 off Big Pine Drive, at the Fort Wilderness Campground.
“Mr. Mitchell, I see you found the place.”
“I would not be much of investigator if I could not and remember just call me Miles.” I said extending my hand to Ben Kingsley who hired me a week before. I looked around at the campsite noting the huge rolling mobile mansion, the RV was huge and silver and looked immaculate.
“It is big, isn’t it?” Ben Kingsley said as I looked over the ten wheeled vehicle.
I simply nodded. “And this is where Mr. Wheeler will be staying for the duration of the job? I won’t have to help him move it.” I said this last part as I had no clue how to drive one of these things and I never wanted to try.
“Oh no, the dealer actually moved it here for us and will move it when Mr. Wheeler’s vacation is completed, and in addition to this space we have rented the two spaces on either side of this so there is ample parking for your vehicle. He said this last part while looking at my 1996 green and wood paneled station wagon.
I smiled. I had just washed her, and she was looking pretty good, although the AC had been making a little weird noise lately. I gave a slight shake to my head I would get it looked at after this job. “So where is Mr. Wheeler?” I looked around. “Inside?” I said trying to look through the glare on the window.
“Mr. Wheeler is currently walking around the area; his doctor wants him to walk a couple of miles every day.”
“That should not be a problem here.” Miles said. “The average visitor walks about eight miles a day.”
“Eight miles a day huh? I bet I will be doing sixteen in a two weeks.” A deep voice said from behind me.
“Mr. Wheeler I would like to introduce Miles Mitchell, Private Investigator and for the duration of your stay here your bodyguard.”
Mr. Wheeler stuck out his hand and Miles reciprocated. The grasp was firm, and I could feel the calluses. “Bodyguard huh, so that is what they’re listing your fee under for the accounting department. More like a glorified babysitter to keep me out of everyone’s hair.” Mr. Wheeler paused looking over Miles. “Your real job is to keep me occupied and away from computers and phones so I do not mess up the partnership deal between my company and the Anno Funai Construction Company, my board thinks I am too volatile for negotiations and demanded I take this ‘sabbatical’ where I would not mess things up but still be available to sign papers should the need arise.”
I simply nodded, hopefully knowingly. The most I knew about big business deals was when I inadvertently used a coupon and the grocery store said it was double coupon day.
“And you Mr. Mitchell are here to confirm I live up to the ‘non-interference’ order that the board of directors has placed on me, so no phone calls, except to friends and family, and no computers.”
I nodded again and added. “You can just call me Miles.”
“Okay Miles, Mr. Kingsley has ensured all my physical needs are met, I have a personal chef coming in to prepare meals and such, while you will be assisting me in learning about Walt Disney World.”
“I can do that sir, have you ever been here on vacation before.”
“Never.”
“So, you know nothing about Walt Disney World.”
“I think you misunderstood me, I know nothing about vacations, I have never been on one before.”
“Never?” I said a bit surprised.
“Well, I went to New York City once with my family, but I had a few deals to seal and my family complained that I missed everything.”
“I see.”
The next few days we got into a routine, I would arrive at the campsite around nine in the morning, Ken Wheeler would be finishing his breakfast and then we would use Disney transportation to go to the different park. Mostly walking, me occasionally sharing trivia about the parks.
Mr. Wheeler was bored with it all and preoccupied, I imagine on the deal he was currently not a part of. He talked about his company a lot, how he had built up from one man handyman business with a beat-up truck into a multi-million company.
My job was simple, it required me to be with him from 9 am till 7 pm, he paid for my lunch and dinner, and after walking his required miles for the day we would head back to his campsite where he would read from his tablet while drinking copious amounts cranberry juice, and I would retrieve whatever book I had from the library in my car. He did not talk much; he was always polite but not overly sharing.
It was one of these lazy afternoons when I asked him about the cranberry juice that he finally revealed something personal about himself.
“Miles,” He said in the tone of an older wiser man. “A long life of living on coffee and other bad health habits has effected me in an embarrassing manner, my doctor has told me I have kidney stones.”
I nodded. “I have heard those are a discomfort.”
“An understatement.” Mr. Wheeler stated wincing.
There was a pause in our conversation. “Do you trust me Mr. Wheeler?”
He snorted. “If I can’t trust my ‘bodyguard’, who can I trust?”
I looked at my watch and told him we were going to the Magic Kingdom.
Two hours later we had ridden Big Thunder Mountain three times, with some trading and moving around we rode in the last car every time.
Mr. Wheeler passed three kidney stones that night.
To finish the story: 
Categories: A Miles Mitchell Story, Outrageous Lies and Tales
Stories and Quotes from the Mind* and Keyboard of A.A.Forringer 
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Thank you, working on more stuff when I can.