Posted in My Views On The Real World

Solar Powered Cemetery Lights, really?


Just came back from walking my dogs, one of my normal tracks, up the hill, around the church and back down thru the graveyard and down the hill again.  I have been doing this track nearly every morning since I moved back to the country, but this was the first time I have done it in the evening and I saw something really disturbing.

In the graveyard there was an embarrassing number of solar powered cemetery lights.  I knew there were some in this graveyard I walk by and then thru, but I have just seen it early in the morning after they had been running all night so they are almost out of juice, a few here and there, but this time I went soon after sundown and discovered them all over this boneyard. 

I am of two opinions of the dead, either you are dead and that is the end, or you have an immortal soul that is made up of the “true” you and it is no longer encased in the meat and bones of your body.  Personally I hope it is the latter but it is one of these two options. (f the soul stays with your rotting, decaying cadaver, well that would be really screwed up and I would complain to management.)

So the lights are not for the dead, they are beyond caring one way or the other what happens on the plot of land that holds their corpse.  So the lights are for the living, and what a mixture they are, all colors, all styles and shapes. (I will wait here while you click on this link that I found googling Cemetery Lights).  Angels and crosses seem to be really popular, although I saw some flowers with fiber optics that I did not see in my brief search of lighting accouterments for the dearly departed last resting place.

Now I am not much of a graveyard person, I find them interesting for the history they represent and for a genealogical researchers resource they are probably pretty important, but besides that to me they are just a really big waste of space that could be growing veggies or something equally useless like a golf course; at least someone would be getting some use of them. 

The person is dead  so they don’t need a light and most times I have visited a graveside with a relative it has been in daylight hours when you can check and see if the caretaker is doing his job and mowing the grass and not chipping the headstone with the mower.  If a person is going to graveyard at night it is probably a bunch of kids with a six pack of PBR or a bottle of Mad Dog 20/20 wearing Iron Maiden or Black Sabbath t-shirts.  

If the trend continues at the rate I have seen it will not be long before every tombstone comes with a solar panel and a computer chip that can be programmed to show any number of things on an array of light emitting diodes (LED).

I myself am not going to be buried, it is the crematorium for me, up in smoke as it were, so my daughter will not have to decide if Dad’s headstone  should have the multi-colored light show with words popping up like I am writing them (If so I hope it types out knock knock jokes) or should she go with a set pattern of Dad as a cartoon caricature alternating between Disneyfication, Marvel Superheroish and Simpsonized. 

Please people we have enough light pollution and cheap crap out there, keep the gardens of stone free of this kind of sentimental sensationalistic junk.  Let the kids drinking cheap beer on Uncle Oscar’s grave have a little bit of privacy. 


Posted in Movie Speeches

Teenagers- Speech


From the 1990 movie Pump up the Volume, one of the great speechs in the movie by Christian Slater. (Sorry about some of the vulgar imagery and language, but I do agree with his attitude.)

Mark is an intelligent but shy teenager who has just moved to Arizona from the East Coast. His parents give him a short-wave radio so he can talk to his pals, but instead he sets up shop as pirate deejay Hard Harry, who becomes a hero to his peers while inspiring the wrath of the local high school principal. When one of Harry’s listeners commits suicide and Harry- inspired chaos breaks out at the school, the authorities are called in to put a stop to Harry’s broadcasts.

You hear about some kid who did something stupid, something
desperate. What possessed him. How could he do such a terrible thing. It’s really quite
simple actually. Consider the life of a teenager. You have parents, teachers telling you
what to do. You have movies, magazines, and TV telling you what to do. But you know
what you have to do. Your job, your purpose, is to get accepted, get a cute girl friend, and
think up something great to do with the rest of your life. What if you’re confused and
can’t imagine a career? What if you’re funny looking and you can’t get a girl friend? You
see no one wants to hear it, but the terrible secret is that being young is sometimes less
fun than being dead.

Suicide is wrong, but the interesting thing about it is how
uncomplicated it seems. There you are, you got all these problems swarming around your
brain, and here is one simple, one incredibly simple solution. I’m just surprised it doesn’t
happen every day around here. No now they’re going to say I said offing yourself is
simple, but no, no, no, no, it’s not simple. It’s like everything else you have to read the
fine print. For instance, assuming there is a heaven who would ever wanna go there, you
know. I mean think about it, sitting on this cloud, you know it’s nice, it’s quiet, there’s no
teachers, there’s no parents, but guess what? There’s nothing to do. Fucking boring.
Another thing to remember about suicide is that it is not a pretty picture. First of all, you
shit your shorts you know. So there you are dead, people are weeping over you, crying,
girls you never spoke to are saying, “Why? Why? Why?” and you have a load in your
shorts. That’s the way I see it. Sue me. Now, they’re saying I shouldn’t think stuff like
this. They’re saying something is wrong with me, that I should be ashamed. Well, I’m sick
of being ashamed. Aren’t you?

I don’t mind being dejected and rejected, but I’m not going to be ashamed about it.

At least pain is real. You look around and you see nothing is real,
but the pain is real. You know, even this show isn’t real. This isn’t me; I’m using a voice
disguiser. I’m a phoney fuck just like my Dad, just like anybody. You see, the real me is
just as worried as the rest of you. They say I’m disturbed, well of course I’m disturbed. I
mean we’re all disturbed, and if we’re not, why not? Doesn’t this blend of blindness and
blandness want to make you do something crazy? Then why not do something crazy? It
makes a hell of a lot of sense than blowing you fucking brains out you know. Go nuts, go
crazy, get creative! You got problems? You just chuck’em, nuke’em! They think you’re
moody? Make’em think you’re crazy, make’em think you might snap! They think you got
attitude? You show’em some real attitude! Come on, go nuts, get crazy. Hey no more Mr.
Nice Guy.

The Youtube Clip. The whole movie is available on Youtube.