Posted in Quotes



I regret to say that we of the FBI are powerless to act in cases of oral-genital intimacy, unless it has in some way obstructed interstate commerce.   J. Edgar Hoover

John Edgar Hoover (January 1, 1895 – May 2, 1972), better known as J. Edgar Hoover, was the first Director of the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) of the United States. He was appointed as the sixth director of the Bureau of Investigation — predecessor to the FBI — in 1924 and was instrumental in founding the FBI in 1935, where he remained director until his death in 1972, aged 77. Hoover is credited with building the FBI into a larger crime-fighting agency than it was at its inception and with instituting a number of modernization to police technology, such as a centralized fingerprint file and forensic laboratories.




Posted in My Views On The Real World

2016 Is Over. (and this is what I learned)


  1. Americans are still pretty arrogant and have no long term memory.

Exhibit 1:   In 2016 we lost a bunch of famous people, so what, that is nothing new.  Last year Leonard Nimoy, Wes Craven, Yogi Berra and Maureen O’Hare all passed away.  In 2014 Robin Williams, Shirley Temple, Joe Cocker, Casey Kasem, Harold Ramis and Phillip Seymour Hoffman died.   1977 saw the death  of Elvis Presley, Werner Von Braun, Groucho Marx, Zero Mostel and Charlie Chaplin.  1959 was the last we heard from Ritchie Valens, Buddy Holly, J.P.  “The Big Bopper” Richardson, Cecil B. DeMille, Lou Costello, Frank Lloyd Wright, and the original  “Man of Steel” George Reeves.  Stop acting like 2016 was something special or out of the ordinary.  Every year people die this year was no different than any other year in the history of the world.  Celebrate the achievements and what wonders those people gave us but don’t be so egotistic to believe that 2016 was anything especially tragic.

Exhibit 2:  The whole presidential election, from beginning to now it was a very bad joke and very few people realize that history is going to look back at us and try and guess what drug was in the drinking water.   We had a choice between an arrogant self absorbed, proudly unsophisticated reality star who’s biggest talent seems to be self promotion and an arrogant, power obsessed, out of touch individual, who would not condemn her monster of a spouse even when he abused a powerless subordinate.   Then people were seemingly outraged that another government would try and influence our election but were blind to the knowledge that the American government has been interfering in other countries’ elections  for close to sixty years.

  1. The unexpected or failures are not all bad and can become great.

I did not complete a book this year. I did a lot of work on the next one, Primary Collision but at this point I am not anywhere near completion.  I did write a lot of good stuff this year;  We Need A Monster (which some people loved), A Fire (a piece about sex), Solar Powered Cemetery Lights, Really?, Take Me Out To The Ball Game, and an article about The Bayernhof Museum.

You would not think a day of hard work would be memorable. Throwing hay bales with my brothers to get my younger brother’s ranch set up for the winter was terrific.  My brothers and I baled a lot of hay on an eighty acre farm growing up, working long hot hours behind an old John Deere tractor and bailer.  Throwing hay with them this year , now that are 47 to 51 years old made me feel connected to them like I have not felt in years.  (My family also built a concrete block wall and we put up a fence on his ranch.)

A lady I was dating broke up with me.  That may sound like a bad thing  but I have had more enjoyment telling the story of how she broke up with me then I might have gotten from the actual relationship.  (I will not put the story in writing as it makes her look bad, but if talk to me I will gladly tell it to you, it involves me sending her flowers on Valentine Day. I am such a monster.)

My love life described simply:  After being run over by a very large truck. One of those bemouth tractor trailers with three trailers.  After a long slow recovery  I cautiously approached the road again, I looked left, I looked right, I looked left again then I got clipped by a clown car that was driving on the sidewalk. 

  1. One of the most important things we have in life is the stories we make with the people we love.

Would my story of going to Voodoo Donuts in Denver at midnight on a Tuesday night be as exciting if my daughter was not with me?  She claimed that there was  marijuana in her doughnut  and  it made her paranoid.  (Not true, there was marijuana in my doughnuts that is why I let her drive,  just kidding, Voodoo doughnuts does not sell THC products.)

Or on the same trip my daughter showing off her mad skills of dealing with Disneyland Cast Members  as she wove a  a strings of fibs together so we could go to the front of the line like we had an Fast Pass.

Then there my trip to see my best friend, Scott Beck’s, full ordination as a minister in Methodist Church and my car died. (Looking back I probably should have not taken it as it had two tires in the grave and the other two on black ice.)  I sold the dead car to a junk man in Virginia for $80.00 and my great and wonderful parents drove six hours to pick me up and drive me home on Fathers Day.

All in all 2016 has been a year, some parts better than others, some parts worse than others.   This year is what I made of it, I have no one else to blame or give credit to if this year was not full and packed with adventures and accomplishments.



Posted in Movie Speeches

Hope – Speech

Opening scenes of Good Will Hunting


Though Will Hunting (Matt Damon) has genius-level intelligence (such as a talent for memorizing facts and an intuitive ability to prove sophisticated mathematical theorems), he works as a janitor at MIT and lives alone in a sparsely furnished apartment in an impoverished South Boston neighborhood. An abused foster child, he subconsciously blames himself for his unhappy upbringing and turns this self-loathing into a form of self-sabotage in both his professional and emotional lives. Hence, he is unable to maintain either a steady job or a steady romantic relationship.

Chuckie: Every day I come by your house and I pick you up. And we go out. We have a few drinks, and a few laughs, and it’s great. But you know what the best part of my day is? For about ten seconds, from when I pull up to the curb and when I get to your door, ’cause I think, maybe I’ll get up there and I’ll knock on the door and you won’t be there. No goodbye. No see you later. No nothing. You just left. I don’t know much, but I know that.

From the movie Good Will Hunting a movie full of good speeches and language.   The third banana in the cast, Ben Affleck, following Matt Damon and the late great Robin Williams.

ben affleck

Posted in A man should know who he is, My Views On The Real World

A man should know who he is.

(Like cereal some shifting and settling may occur while shipping, so the views espoused may have changed since the writing transpired. This writer reserves the right to change his mind, evolve, adapt, modify his views, adjust and be proven wrong. ) 



A man should know who he is. In my opinion there are two questions a person needs to answer in this life, ‘Who am I?’, and ‘What is my purpose here’, or to put the second question in slightly differently manner ‘Why am I here?’ I think if you answer the first question fully enough then it will point you in the direction of the second, or at least give you a couple of clues as to your purpose.
One way to figure out who we are is by figuring out what is truly important to us. When we separate the important from the unimportant. We decide what is junk and what is precious. A great movie for figuring out who we are is Good Will Hunting, and I particularly like this interaction between Robin William’s character and Matt Damon’s.

Sean: So if I asked you about art, you’d probably give me the skinny on every art book ever written. Michelangelo, you know a lot about him. Life’s work, political aspirations, him and the pope, sexual orientations, the whole works, right? But I’ll bet you can’t tell me what it smells like in the Sistine Chapel. You’ve never actually stood there and looked up at that beautiful ceiling; seen that. If I ask you about women, you’d probably give me a syllabus about your personal favorites. You may have even been laid a few times. But you can’t tell me what it feels like to wake up next to a woman and feel truly happy. You’re a tough kid. And I’d ask you about war, you’d probably throw Shakespeare at me, right, “once more unto the breach dear friends.” But you’ve never been near one. You’ve never held your best friend’s head in your lap, watch him gasp his last breath looking to you for help. I’d ask you about love, you’d probably quote me a sonnet. But you’ve never looked at a woman and been totally vulnerable. Known someone that could level you with her eyes, feeling like God put an angel on earth just for you. Who could rescue you from the depths of hell. And you wouldn’t know what it’s like to be her angel, to have that love for her, be there forever, through anything, through cancer. And you wouldn’t know about sleeping sitting up in the hospital room for two months, holding her hand, because the doctors could see in your eyes, that the terms “visiting hours” don’t apply to you. You don’t know about real loss, ’cause it only occurs when you’ve loved something more than you love yourself. And I doubt you’ve ever dared to love anybody that much. And look at you… I don’t see an intelligent, confident man… I see a cocky, scared shitless kid. But you’re a genius Will. No one denies that. No one could possibly understand the depths of you. But you presume to know everything about me because you saw a painting of mine, and you ripped my fucking life apart. You’re an orphan right?
[Will nods]
Sean: You think I know the first thing about how hard your life has been, how you feel, who you are, because I read Oliver Twist? Does that encapsulate you? Personally… I don’t give a shit about all that, because you know what, I can’t learn anything from you, I can’t read in some fuckin’ book. Unless you want to talk about you, who you are. Then I’m fascinated. I’m in. But you don’t want to do that do you sport? You’re terrified of what you might say. Your move, chief.

Sean had himself pretty well figured out and he was able to help Will figure out who he was. Sean, Robin William’s character knew what was important, intimacy friendship, loss, and love. Also important is those moments that blow big holes in your very existence, that you mark down as this was my life before and this is my life after.
Now then life is not like the movies, we don’t have someone writing our lines (I know I wish I did sometimes, I would be a lot funnier and seem a lot smarter). But they represent our lives, the old question is asked, does life imitate art or does art imitate life. Well I say yes. Yes they do.

A man who knows who he is very powerful, we have made some great scenes in movies of how a man defines himself. One of the classics is from the Grapes of Wrath when at the end Henry Fonda gives this statement.

grapes_wrath_5Tom Joad: Then it don’t matter. I’ll be all around in the dark – I’ll be everywhere. Wherever you can look – wherever there’s a fight, so hungry people can eat, I’ll be there. Wherever there’s a cop beatin’ up a guy, I’ll be there. I’ll be in the way guys yell when they’re mad. I’ll be in the way kids laugh when they’re hungry and they know supper’s ready, and when the people are eatin’ the stuff they raise and livin’ in the houses they build – I’ll be there, too.
( at the 1 minute mark, sorry for the comments by Jane Fonda.)

A little too collectivist for my tastes but the point is there. A man believes he is defined by bigger things than just what he does for a living. It is done by what he lives for and who he lives for. A more recent example is from the movie Gladiator when Russell Crowe gives this statement:

gladiatorMaximus: My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.
( 25 seconds to 56 seconds)

Or this from the movie Secondhand Lions with the great Robert Duvall:

hubmcainHub: I’m Hub McCann. I’ve fought in two World Wars and countless smaller ones on three continents. I led thousands of men into battle with everything from horses and swords to artillery and tanks. I’ve seen the headwaters of the Nile, and tribes of natives no white man had ever seen before. I’ve won and lost a dozen fortunes, KILLED MANY MEN and loved only one woman with a passion a FLEA like you could never begin to understand. That’s who I am.
( 56 seconds to 1:27)

Now then I know what you are thinking; these are all about men, by men, dealing with things of men. Well yes, but you see I am a man. I have no clue how a woman thinks, heck I barely know how I think and I am in my forties. But I am searching out how I am made, how I am put together, I have a few answers. I think most of us are looking for the answers, ones we come up with for ourselves. Ones that when we do put them together for ourselves we go “hot damn, that is me, that is who I am.”
But this is my statement about who I am. It has not changed much since I wrote it in November 2008, and I have not opened the document since 2010, but I have it tucked in the cover of my IPad to remind me occasionally.

I am an adopted son of the Most High God; my adoption written and paid for by the Blood of His Son Jesus Christ, I should be relying on His Grace, and His Strength and not my own
I am a guardian, standing between the sheep of this world and the wolves, I am a sheepdog
I am one who fights against chaos and cruelty and tries to bring order and love to my corner of the world
I am husband to my wife, who makes me a better man,
Dad to my daughter, who needs me to be a good man,
I am a Scouter which means teacher, coach, counselor, builder, friend, organizer, driver, cook and clown
I come from a line of good and noble people, who with hard work and sacrifice have made this nation strong
I am a citizen and soldier who believes in the ideals, words and sprit of the Declaration of Independence, the Constitution and the Gettysburg Address

Well you might be saying that statement is pretty silly. Well to tell you the truth I really don’t care what you think of my statement of who I think I am. I did not write it for you, I wrote if for me. But it encapsulate my life and who I believe I am, who I want to be, what I am striving to live up too. It took me several months to write that statement, probably years to figure out I needed to write it down.
Do I always live up to it, heck no, but that is life trying something, failing and then getting up again and moving forward. That is one of the reasons I believe everyone likes the Looney Tunes Road Runner cartoons, not for the Road Runner but for Wile E. Coyote, he never gives up, he never surrenders, and he always tries again and again and again. Because the last time you don’t get up that is it, the time you stop trying, the time you stop seeking answers that is it game over, the end, do not pass go do not collect $200.00. And like an Old Italian proverb states, when the game is over both the King and the Pawn go into the same box.

Borrowed the part about Sheepdogs from LTC Grossman and his article titled Of On Sheep, Wolves and Sheepdogs in particular. LTC Grossman is an excellent speaker go see him if you ever get the chance.