Kissing a man with a beard is a lot like going to a picnic. You don’t mind going through a little bush to get there! Minnie Pearl
Sarah Ophelia Colley Cannon (October 25, 1912 – March 4, 1996), known professionally as her stage character Minnie Pearl, was an American country comedian who appeared at the Grand Ole Opry for more than 50 years (from 1940 to 1991) and on the television show Hee Haw from 1969 to 1991.
My wife, she can’t cook at all. When we go on a picnic, I bring Tums for the ants. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield (born Jacob Rodney Cohen, November 22, 1921 – October 5, 2004) was an American comedian and actor, known for the catchphrase “I don’t get no respect!” and his monologues on that theme. He is also remembered for his 1980s film roles, especially in Easy Money, Caddyshack, and Back to School.
Very, very funny man, and from what I have read he was hugely instrumental in helping a lot of young comedians.